January 16th, 2009
For Immediate Release
ABC Real Estate
123 Creative Way
Logan, UT 84341
801-555-4567
Successful Idea Moves to Cache Valley
ABC Real Estate Aims for Investors
LOGAN, Utah--ABC Real Estate was created last summer, in August of 2008. Preston Parker, the President of ABC Real Estate
Friday, January 16, 2009
Draft Version Press Release 1: Announcement
Posted by usumatty at 1/16/2009 01:24:00 PM
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2 comments:
I thought that your first and only sentence was boring. I think that using more "hook" type words would help out more. However, usually the first two sentences tell us exactly what the whole document is going to be about. I didn't really get that out of your sentence.
I didn't get too much farther than you. Nice Headline idea. The words were boring, perhaps you could rearrange them.
I really like your leads! I also like how you started out. It is always good to get a little back ground up front so they know who you are talking about. Now just expand and talk about what the company actually does. It looks like you're off to a great start.
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